Oh God, 10 nights. That's all there is.

Ugh, 6pm-12pm, that is when my stomach works the most

Hanbyel, Bo Yeon, and my day, 26th May

Dongguk University

May 28th, Hanbyel, Jay, Ava, Bo Yeon, Che Yeon, Ji Won, and I went to Dongguk University's festival, where Bella attended. With little butterflies flying in our heart we made our trip to Dongguk University. Just to become college students, we were excited to visit a University and enjoy a festival.

We walked and walked. Finally we reached to the destination and the view was not like we expected but wasn't disappointing as well. There were so many college students and each shops arranged by different clubs were very interesting. Most sold foods, some sold clothing, and there were games as well. Hanbyel, Jay, Ava, and I walked around and eating foods we could not resist smiling. We then went to concert hall and saw dancers dancing then finally saw a group called 10cm. The group was one of our favorite singers and definitely a favorite group for Hanbyel and Ava, we started to taking videos and laughing out loud. After listening to 10cm we walked to the station Bella was in and after meeting with Bo Yeon, Che Yeon, and Ji Won, we ate, played game, and talked.

The feeling we had wouldn't be easily described in words but definitely it was the time we would ever forget. Even when we met on Sunday to celebrate Young Ha's birthday, our memory of Saturday still were inside of us wanting to go back and feel the enthusiasm we had.

Sunny

May 18th, Hanbyel, Jay, Kyle, Young Ha, and I made a trip to Kang Nam to watch Sunny.

Sunny was very different from any other movie we could have watched that day. It was a story of seven girls who have been very close under group name Sunny reuniting after growing up. All seven had unique characteristics and all became one as a group.

After twenty years or so, when one of the group was walking down the hall way of a hospital, she sees another member of the group. She had a date given to leave the world in a month due to cancer. Day after day, woman who saw her friend at the hospital began coming to visit her and she according to her friend's wish, began looking for the rest of members. Through an agency, she finally found all and all were the same as they were as teenagers. With friend's death date, they all live days just like they used to thinking the world was their own that they are the main character. Even at the funeral, they all dance for the friend to fulfill her wish of seeing them together dancing to the song they always used to.

With laughs and tears this movie ended and we all were stunned how precious their friendship was and we also wanted our high school memories to be just like them so we could always look back. The movie allowed us to make each other seem even more precious than ever and to appreciate of the time we had with them.

With this mind, while we were walking down the road we all picked same shaped ring and shared, just like Sunny, we five of us wanted to make our friendship more precious than it could be.

My love, Hanbyel Kim

Oh god, how much I love her!

She has invaded my mind I cannot resist thinking about her.

Oh god, how much I have fallen into her!




At dormitory, there are five girls: Hanbyel, Jessie, Ashley, 8th grader, and me. Most of my days were spent with Jessie in the beginning but due to her busy schedule, I gradually broadened my friendship and got very tight with Hanbyel, day after day.

We had time to chat, each revealing emotion that we weren't aware of and the more we spent the more we made another comfortable. Not sure how I am for her, but at least for me she has become one of comfortable person I could be around with.

Most of days she had to go to dance practices after school and most of days I was there watching them practice and have dinner with them. Not too close but not too far, that is the distance I have with her.

Drop. Drop. Drop.

Drop 

Drop

Drop

Drop of water keeps on dropping and now the sound of rain fills the outside world. Wet roads, the cleanness of air, but gloomy clouds, that is how outside has changed into from a bright, hot, humid day. 

I begin my day with different feeling inside me. With background music of raindrops I add extra sounds putting earphones to my ears. Beats, rhythms, and different pitches make the perfect music. 

Along with music, I begin walking on the road. One holding a bag filled with little precious stuffs of mine and the other holding an umbrella. Slowly I make myself a main character walking on the road and do not care what is happening around me. The only thing I see is the road ahead of me and the only sound I hear is the music coming through earphones connected to iPod. 

Friends waiting at the cafe, I slowly walk and after meeting friend I choose either to go my friend's or my home to be the most lazy people ever or to go to movies. 

Not one is better than the other since both are real good to do on a rainy day. 

To stay at home with constantly giggling and chatting with a friend or to go out watching a movie.

Music

Music is mine
Music is yours
Music is round
Music is square
Music is blue
Music is green
Music is am
Music is pm
Music is happiness
Music is sadness
Music is life
Music is death
Music is the world.

ShabZ Aftermath 

"Music is the key to the female heart." -- Johann G. Seume



Just like the quote, music has been invading my heart for days now.
I begin my day with music, spends all day with music, then sleeps with music.

Just like the quote, music has opened my heart and is seeing me inside and out.

Summmmmerrrr is comin'

Summer is finally on it's way. The shirt is turned into a short sleeve, pants are getting shorter, and vivid colors are seen all over the place.

June 9th, the graduation day, is the last day of high school and the beginning of summer.

Mid August is when I will be going back to the States to once again start a new life. In between then and now, there is about two and half months of break.

Now, the question is what would I be doing during that break?

One answer I know for sure is to spend as much time I could with my family. My life of spending only four months a year begins again in three months; there is no time to waste. My family would probably go on a trip somewhere in Korea to make new memories but what I would like to do is to spend normal daily life with all my family members. To do so, I will be working out at a same place where my father works out, attending musicals or any music related concerts with my mother, and probably learn and talk with my brother about my future.

Yet, I know that I cannot rely too much on my family. I know I would have a great emptiness as soon as I am away from them. I would not only try having as much fun I could with my family, but also would have to control my emotion and practice being independence again.

Summer the season of bikini for girls, I am so excited for the warmth and the bright sun that is to shine everywhere my footsteps will be placed.

What I love doing?

Mmm...... definitely watching movies! But, sure that is boring to write about so I will tell you another favorite thing I love to do!

Knitting!

Haha

Just like my mother, I am born with a talent of good making skills, therefore knitting has become one of task I do to get rid of my stress or to make personal presents to my friends.

I have made several scarves and attempted to make mittens but the favorite I love to knit is either making scarves with patterns with, only with very soft and good yarns or making cushions.

This is a scarf I made to one of my friend who loved, absolutely loved yellow! Using yellow and ivory color and spiral patterns I made a long and thick scarf for her and I am pretty sure she often wears it during winter.

There are more I made but not all are photo taken :(

Oh and the cushion I made has a quite saddening story behind it! I am sure most of my friends very well remember of that incident since I made a great fuss about it. It was a Junior year during the end of January leading to February when the season of love, the Valentine's day was coming. I was making heart shaped cushion and of course since it is a cushion I had to put some cottons into it. Yet, I had no cotton what so ever near me. And I must tell you, I love pillows that I owned three to four pillow just on my bed. Meaning, I had not a single thought to open my pillow and take out some cottons from it. Therefore next solution were dolls. Funny cause most of girls adore dolls. However, I was quite different. I did not adore dolls as much as others. I often threw them or placed them somewhere I would really look at. After doubting for thirty minutes, I reached my hands to the dolls in my room. I believe I had five at that time. All from different people but the one that caught my eyes was the one I got from my mentor but the doll that got caught by my friends was the one from my ex-boyfriend. Haha. How cruel of they, they set their minds on it so with no questioning, they were ready to cut it open one hand with the doll and the other with scissors. Then I had to decide which part to cut. Surely I loved that doll as I got it from someone I like so cutting part had to be less painful than it could ever be. So soon I started asking my friends, even texting, then the decision was made. To cut the foot of the doll and take out the cotton from legs to up. :( Aw, it hurt my heart so much it took no joke, about ten minutes to cut.

Now, I will show the final piece of the cushion!

:) Adorable right? The cushion was perfect heart shape and the fuzziness of the yarn was the key point!

The doll I cut :( I especially took pictures with the doll and a cushion after the cushion was put with the cottons :( Major surgery ever!

The original shape of a doll!

:( :( ;( ;(
Sorry JMK :( I did not mean to hurt the doll you gave me but... the cushion does look adorable, right? :)

Do You Hear?

It is May 4, 2011

May 22nd, the date I was supposed to graduate, but no longer the date I graduate from high school

It takes eighteen more days for me to graduate

To get out of a high school

I first thought, 'Oh god, I wish to get out of this place in a heart bit' 

Then, now I think, 'Why eager for something that isn't to happen, why not just enjoy the day I have been given'

Therefore, I am sitting here writing this thinking, 'Wow, Hwayeon have you really begun to have feelings attached to this school?'

And I answer just inside of me, quietly, 'Maybe. Maybe I have already been attached to the school. Maybe, I just wasn't aware of how I was' 

A great change of decision was made yesterday. 

'To go, or not to go. That is the question.'

My question was to whether go to the family weekend on 5th of May. Buffet, face painting, lots of activities, friends, etc are available there, but the turning point for me was the blue shirt I saw right after the school. 

Not a dark blue nor a light blue, but some sort of blue that is clear and somehow reminds me of a hope. That was the color that caught my eyes. 

Then with tempting introduction of family weekend by Mr. Burke, I began hesitating to buy a ticket to home. 

'To go, or not to go. That is the question.'

Haha. How ridiculous it would've sounded like when I told my dad that I would like to go to the family weekend just cause of the shirt. Haha. He was wordless. Haha. He was stunned for the moment then soon said, 'for a shirt? for a shirt Hwayeon?' then in the end after the disappointment of not being able to see me a day early he says, 'if you wish to, i will see you a day early than normal weekend anyways.' 

But of course I added, 'Dad, I'm not sure if I am going for sure. I am going to think. Think till Wednesday.' Then I thought once again. 'To go, or not to go. That is the question.'

And I am still thinking. Still thinking, 'To go, or not to go. That is the question.' I, not perfectly feel, but most likely feel how Shakespeare would've felt when he wrote this in Hamlet.

Tik-tok. Tik-tok.

(Click. See how it tiks and toks so fast.)

Tik-tok. Tik-tok.

Time is ticking but my heart isn't

How can it tik and tok so fast

Can't believe it's already been May 

Can't believe there's only a month left for the school to end 

Oh, how could you tik and tok so fast 

My heart beat is still the same but your heart is beating faster and faster day by day